Why There’s No Such Thing as “Unhealthy” Emotions

Why There’s No Such Thing as “Unhealthy” Emotions

“The more you hide your feelings, the more they show. The more you deny your feelings, the more they grow.” – Anonymous When I first started exploring personal development and digging down past my defenses and conditioning to find a more authentic version of myself, I thought the aim was to “fix myself” so I could be “happy”. Not having any clue about what “happiness” really meant at that time (or what I wanted it to mean to me), I remember going into my first therapy session thinking that, if the therapy was a success, when I finished I just wouldn’t experience uncomfortable or challenging feelings anymore. Little did I realize then that an important part of my journey would be learning to accept that those feelings, as uncomfortable as they might be, are in integral part of the human experience. Over the past few years, I’ve learned that so-called “unhealthy” feelings like anger, envy, and frustration are not only natural experiences but they can actually be helpful. What makes or breaks our relationships and experience of life isn’t whether or not we feel these emotions, but how we respond to them. To feel or not to feel? Early on in my self-discovery journey, I became confused. I was reading a lot of self-help and New Age wisdom that talked about letting go of feelings like anger, jealousy and bitterness in order to reach a state of enlightenment. At the time, the way I interpreted this was that it was wrong to experience these emotions and that, if I wanted to be a healthy person, I needed to reach a...
How Travel Changed My Life (& Could Change Yours Too)

How Travel Changed My Life (& Could Change Yours Too)

“The world is a book and those who do not travel read only one page.” – St. Augustine If you had told me three years ago that I would be writing this now from a colonial casita in Merida, Mexico, I would have responded “Yeah, right…”. But just over three months into a seven-month trip, here I am – and I won’t ever say “Yeah, right…” again. Travel has changed my life. And I think it could change yours too. Travel (especially long-term travel) isn’t for everyone. If you’ve thought about it and are on the fence when it comes to traveling, however, I can assure you that the experiences, benefits and perspective you get are too good to miss. Here are some of the most life-changing aspects I’ve experienced over the past few months: Attachment to Things There’s nothing quite like living out of a backpack for several month to truly cure an attachment to things. The limited space (and my limited strength) has redefined my sense of what I ‘need’. At home, I used to think I ‘needed’ two weeks worth of underwear. Here, I realize that, while it might be more convenient, I don’t even really ‘need’ half of that. Instead, I’ve truly come to appreciate the significance of experiences: I still go to the local mall here in Mexico, but I go to see a movie, people watch and take in more of the culture, not to shop. Priorities Getting out of the UK and leaving behind everything that was familiar has helped me redefine my priorities based on what’s important to me, rather than...