By Mark Harrison

A couple of weeks ago, I went to the races with some friends. I’m not a huge fan of horse racing, but someone was kind enough to invite me and so I went along for some food, some company and to while away a lazy Sunday afternoon. As always, people had various tips and ‘sure things’ and so, just for fun, I placed three bets. Not knowing much about horses, I tend not to follow the races very closely, but placing the bets made watching the races a bit more exciting. The first horse I bet on came fifth, and the second one didn’t seem to be doing very well either for most of the race, but with half a lap to go, the horse shot to the front of the pack and won by a nose. For a short while I was getting excited and started thinking of the money I could win if the third horse came in. I watched the third race with bated breath and, lo and behold, the nag came in well behind. So I went home with nothing, and that, of course, is the nature of gambling.

Some years ago, I made another gamble. I moved to a new country and walked away from my old life – I left behind my job, my friends, my house and my parents. I started again. People have sometimes asked me why I took the risk – wasn’t it too much of a gamble? I have often thought about this, and it seems to me that there is an essential difference between taking a risk and gambling.

Growth and development in any area is a risky business. Steven Covey, in his famous Seven Habits of Highly effective People, writes about the importance of pushing outside your comfort zone. This is always uncomfortable and always risky. Whenever we try something new, there is a good likelihood of failure – but this is how we learn and how we grow.  As infants, we learned to walk by falling over – and sometimes getting hurt. This basic pattern stays with us throughout life.

The potential for pain or loss is an inevitable risk of growth, but this risk is not the same as gambling. Effective people understand the risks involved in a particular course of action and actively seek to limit their downside. Driving a car is a risk – people die in accidents every day – but we limit the risk by making sure the car is in good shape, taking out insurance, not drinking before getting behind the wheel, not driving in very bad weather, and so on.

Risk can be managed and approached thoughtfully. The only sensible way to approach gambling, however, is to be prepared to lose everything. When I placed my little bet on the horses, I did so assuming that I was going to lose it all – it was not a risk, it was a sure loss.

Of course, people who know a lot about horses and racing can probably bet in a much more informed way and, as such, their bets would be less of a gamble. But they would still need to assess, and limit, their downside. So how is this done?

First, you need to clearly understand what you are doing. Obviously, you’re not going to try to drive a car if you’ve never had a test, and it would be similarly unwise to start a business without some proper advice or guidance although, oddly, people do the latter all the time – and often fail. This failure can come from not understating the terrain before you set off, and so a risk which could be managed becomes a gamble.

Second, you need to make sure you have the right tools for the job. An experienced mountain climber wouldn’t dream of going climbing without all the right kit – to go unprepared is to court disaster and, once again, to turn a manageable risk into a gamble. A friend of mine once went climbing quite a difficult slope in a pair of trainers. She hurt her legs badly on the descent – a pair of sturdy climbing shoes would have been a more sensible option.

Third, you need supportive and likeminded people around you. Again, a mountain climber is unlikely to set off alone. However experienced ad well equipped he is, there is always the risk of something going wrong – an injury, bad weather – and having help and support if things go wrong can be invaluable. When I moved to my new home, I left everything behind, but I did a good friend to stay with. Her family were locals and so I had a great support network right from the start, and this was an important element in my success.

Finally, the most important thing. While risk should be managed, it should never be avoided. Stepping outside your comfort zone leads to growth, but trying to avoid risk is the most dangerous thing of all since it leads to contraction and loss. Not pushing yourself, not moving outside your comfort zone, means decline and decay. In every part of our lives, there is motion – it is either forward or backwards; we cannot stand still. Starting a new life in a new country has changed me a great deal – I have grown immensely. It was a risk, but it was a risk worth taking.

Author bio: Mark Harrison writes at Effortless Abundance. Check out his latest book, Thirty Days to Change Your Life.

By Tara Sophia Mohr

A while ago, I came across an insight by blogger Angie Mizzell that has stayed with me:

“They never really tell you how unsettling it feels,” she wrote,  “to be a parent, while simultaneously trying to figure out how to be a parent.”

So well put. It struck me that these words hold true for almost everything important we do. We are husbands and wives while we learn how to be husbands and wives. We care for aging parents while learning how to care for aging parents. We learn how to deal with fear while afraid. We learn how to lead while leading. We learn to do our jobs while doing them. We have to fix the plane while flying it.

As Charlie Gilkey has written at his blog, we have to fix the plane while flying it.

The Most Important Skill You Can Learn

Yet most of us forget, again and again, that learning-while-doing is what we’re all up to. We walk through life feeling like we are supposed to know, projecting that other people know, and feeling stressed out when we don’t know.

It’s no wonder. We were told to go to school for 12 or 16 or 20 years to prepare for being a grown up:

Step 1. Learn.

Step 2. Gain Mastery.

Step 3. Execute!

That’s our mental model, but reality looks more like a feedback loop, where not-knowing, doing and learning happen in rapid succession hundreds of times each day.

We need to start seeing learning-while-doing as an art and a meta-skill. Learning-while-doing is a unique mode of action. It requires unique practices, and a particular mindset.

Approaching life in a conscious learning-while-doing mode has many benefits. It allows us to become skillful faster, to refine our approaches again and again.

When we look at life through the lens of perpetual learning-while-doing, we get humble. Really humble. Puffed up chests and certainty and righteousness fall away.

Anything we are working on becomes more interesting, rich and nuanced, because we view it through the lens of learning. We can enjoy the journey in a different way.

10 Practices For Learning While Doing

What’s is required to do learning-while-doing well? What practices promote it, and what gets in the way? Here are my top ten practices for learning-while-doing—drawn from my own experience and that of my coaching clients.

This month, pick one major area of your life in which you learn-while-doing (i.e. managing others, meeting your customers needs, being creative, raising children, etc.). Over the course of the month, try on these ten practices in that area of your life.

A Learning Orientation

1. Embrace Not Knowing. You really, really aren’t supposed to know it all. Your neighbors and co-workers and the perfect family down the block? They don’t know it all either. Take a moment now, and see if you can embrace not knowing. Remind yourself that others don’t know it all either. Let your shoulders drop. Exhale. Once you really embrace not knowing, you can begin to work with reality – rather than resisting it.

2. Be Here Now. If you aren’t awake to the feedback and data available in the moment, you can’t learn-while-doing. It’s that simple. To cultivate your ability to be present, focus your full attention on simple activities when you are doing them. For example, when you are listening to another person, sitting in traffic, or waiting to speak in a meeting, bring your full attention to a point of focus. When your thoughts drift, simply bring your attention back. As your ability to focus increases, so will your ability to be present to learnings that emerge in the moment, while you are in action.

3. Reframe Your Goal. When we set a goal only to “succeed” in a particular activity, we often approach the activity with tunnel vision. We’re so focused on the outcome we want and on executing on the plan to get there, we can’t see red flags or perceive information that would help us get there more quickly or easily. See what happens if you shift your goal from trying to achieve the desired results to learning how to achieve the desired results.

Gathering Learnings

4. Reunite With Your Long-Lost Curiosity. We’re born with immense natural curiosity. Then social norms and often, our educational experiences, squash it. When you embrace not knowing, you give yourself permission to be curious. When you set a learning goal, you give yourself an incentive to be curious. Naturally, curious questions will start to arise: What really works here? Which is more effective, a or b? What got us stuck? Follow these questions. Let your curiosity lead you into valuable learning.

5. Put On Your Lab Coat. Run little experiments. Try out new approaches, new language, new actions. Observe the results, and refine your approach accordingly.

6. Tune In To Results. Gather feedback from others about the impact of your actions. Feedback from others isn’t right or wrong – it just represents the subjective view of the individual who gave it. For that reason, look for themes and focus less on outlying comments. Ask for feedback informally, or use a free feedback tool like Rypple, which allows people to easily share anonymous, online feedback tailored to your questions.

Explore the learning you can mine from internal feedback—from your own emotions or internal sensations. For example, what depletes your energy and what increases it? What leaves you with a knot in your stomach and what leaves you feeling confident and content? As you are doing, pay attention to the internal feedback you receive.

Sustain Yourself & Reinforce What You’ve Learned

7. Find Peers. Learning-while-doing can feel stressful, even scary. Find community or relationships that give you support, encouragement, and remind you that other people are doing just fine learning-while-doing.

8. Put It in Words. As you frame and articulate to others what you’ve learned, you’ll clarify it and teach it to yourself. Teaching is one of the best ways to learn. Speaking is one of the best ways to absorb your own insights.

9. Go Up to the Balcony. Build into your routine daily, weekly or monthly rituals to reflect on what you’ve learned.

10. Know That Learning Is Conscious and Unconscious. Sometimes you’ll have an “aha moment” and walk away with an insight you can articulate. But often, you’ll absorb learning rapidly and unconsciously.

What happens when you put down the attempt to know it all, have it together, and do it right, and instead embrace fully that all work is learning-while-doing work? What shifts when you recognize that others, like you, are simply learning-while doing?

I look forward to hearing your thoughts in the comments.

Author bio: Tara Sophia Mohr is a writer and coach who blogs at Wise Living. You can receive her free, unconventional goals guide, “Turning Goals Upside Down and Inside Out to Get What You Really Want” by clicking here.

By Diggy

Many of us have been taught to strive for being number 1, to be the best at whatever we do. There are certain things in life where it is not possible to be the best, simply because there is no best. One thing that is certain is that it is possible to be your best self, meaning the best person you can possible be. Let me explain…

• In a 100m sprint you can be the best by completing it in the quickest time.
• In a math exam you can be the best by getting the most answers correct.
• As a builder you can be the best by building the most brick walls of the highest quality.

In life, you can be the best by being your best self and living the best possible life you can. I can’t tell you what that best life is. Some people want to put together a fortune. Some people want fame. Some people want to make an impact on the lives of others. Some people want world peace and make it a mission to achieve that. I think that you be your best self by going after your dreams and living up to your full potential.

You Are Capable Of More Than You Think

You may not know what you are capable of. You are capable of much more than you think. You are definitely capable of determining the fact if you are or if you are not living up to your full potential. Are you happy? Are you achieving what you want to achieve? Are you content that you have reached your dreams?

If not, then you should get off your backside and continue working on yourself to be the best possible person that you can be, every single day. Life is a constant journey of discovery, learning, progress, failure, happiness, disappointments and successes. If you take things a day at a time, little by little, then over time you will make huge progress. Don’t aim for the overnight change, this is an illusion or at best reserved for a very lucky few.

There Is No Absolute Best

I’m going to use the following example to explain to you why in some cases there is no absolute best, there is no absolute number 1.

I’m going to give you a choice of a Ferarri, an off-road Jeep, a tractor, and a bus.
Now let me ask you: Which of the above vehicles is the best?

Maybe the obvious choice without thinking would be the Ferarri but with some closer inspection that is not the case. None of the above is an absolute best. In fact, every one of the above vehicles is the best in a certain situation.

• On the racetrack or escaping from someone who wants to kill you or even an appearance at a Hollywood party the Ferarri takes the title of ‘Best’.
• Having to cross a sandy dessert to get to the next town then the offroad Jeep is the best.
• For agriculture purposes to grow crops and prepare the soil, the tractor is the best.
• For transporting mass amounts of people in one go, the bus is the best.

Life Has No Absolute Best

Just like the above examples, the same principle applies to people and life. There is no ‘best’ person and no ‘best’ life. There is no-one that has the best life in the world and every-one else’s life is less fun to live. Every person is unique and different. Everyone has their own strengths and weaknesses. Some people are the best at physical work, others are better at fighting, others are better at sport, others are better at math and problem solving.

Some people advocate working on your weaknesses to get them to the same level as your strengths. This is especially true in schools. If you’re good writing and English, but bad at science and math, teachers put pressure on you to get better at math and science. I don’t believe in this.

I believe in taking your strengths and developing those to incredible levels. Take your natural talent and work on that to turn yourself into a champion at that talent. Do not try and get better at your weaknesses and things you have no passion for just to become a better all-rounder.

I like to take the approach of not striving to be better than everyone else in the world at the expense of not enjoying life. I take the approach of being the best person I can be, constantly improving myself and making myself better while enjoying all that life has to offer. My passion and my drive to become good at the things I want to become good at is enough inspiration and motivation to become the best, although that is not my first intention.

Just like with blogging, or with artists or musicians. Many of the top of their leagues all started out because they were passionate and loved what they did. Their aim was not to become rich or famous, that was a side-effect of their passion, dedication and perseverance.

Unleash the Champion Within You

I believe that every single person on this planet has something that they can become really good at. Not just really good, but ‘among the top of the world’ good. Every single person has the potential to be a champion. That champion is already inside of you, you just have to wake him up.

It is a shame that so many people live their lives without ever living up to their full potential. I don’t claim that I am the best person I can be. In fact, I know I am not, but I am working towards it every single day.

You can become better at anything you put time, energy and effort into. Just because you are not good at something does not mean that you cannot get good at it. Some of the best people in the world used to really suck at what they are now so good at. As Will Smith once said:

“Talent is something you are born with, but skill takes hours upon hours upon hours of incredible effort to achieve”

Less is More

One mistake I had made for the last couple of years is that I would always do too many things at a time. This resulted in being a Jack of all trades but a master of none.

I tried to become good at 3 instruments at once, 5 sports at once, I tried to build 20 websites at the same time, and tried to learn 3 professions simultaneously. The result was (as you can guess) that I never became really good at any of these things and I lost interest in them because I just did not have enough energy and inspiration to keep doing everything at once.

This was my situation until I decided to focus on a maximum of two things at a time. Two sports, one instrument, one profession, one blog. Sure, there are less things that I am becoming good at, but less is more. By cutting down on all my projects and by choosing only one or two that I am really passionate about, the chance is much bigger that I will excel at what I do.

If you are doing the same and spreading yourself too thin, take some time off to look at your life objectively. Choose one or two things that you are good at or passionate about and focus on those one or two things only. You have a champion within you. Get out there and unleash him (or her).

Author bio: Diggy writes all about self improvement and personal growth. If you are looking for motivation, inspiration or useful tips to live a better life, subscribe to his articles via RSS or Email

By Mark Harrison

Viktor Frankl’s short book, Man’s Search for Meaning, has been described as ‘among the most influential works of psychiatric literature since Freud.’ He begins with an account of his experiences in Auschwitz and other concentration camps and then develops the insights from these experiences into a remarkable synthesis.

The book has been the inspiration for many other works, including Stephen Covey’s famous ‘Seven Habits.’ Frankl’s work has a great deal to say about many aspects of life. His insights on the role of the subconscious are particularly interesting.

We know a case in which a violinist always tried to play as consciously as possible. From putting his violin in place on his shoulder to the most trifling technical detail, he wanted to do everything consciously, to perform in full self-reflection. This led to a complete artistic breakdown…. Treatment had to give back to the patient his trust in the unconscious, by having him realize how much more musical his unconscious was than his conscious.

Know who is in control

Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom.

First, we must realize that we are in the driving seat. This is what law of Attraction is all about – we must create consciously. Unlike Pavlov’s dogs or other animals who respond only by instinct, we humans have the power of choice. The Austrian psychiatrist and survivor of the holocaust Viktor Frankl wrote that between stimulus and response there is a gap, and inside that gap lies all of our experience. When we realize that this gap exists and that we can use it, we have tremendous power.

Most people have given that power away. They go straight from stimulus to response without a thought, reacting in the old, habitual way over and over again. It amazes me that people go through life running the same script for year after year, decade after decade, never seeming to realize that they have a choice. But this is the reality – you have free will, you are responsible for how you react, and you have the power to change ‘I must’ into ‘I choose.’ This is Law of Attraction.

It all starts in the mind

Everything can be taken from a man or a woman but one thing: the last of human freedoms to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way.

The most important area in which we operate our freedom is our own mind. We are free to control our thoughts and change our own perception of things. This is a revelation to many people, who believe that thoughts happen to them. In reality, you generate your own thoughts all day long and you can be the master of them. Changing our beliefs is not instantaneous, but our beliefs do change throughout our lives and we can be active in controlling this process.

The way we act, of course, depends on what we believe. It makes sense that changing what we believe will alter the way we behave. Rich people tend naturally to think about money and abundance and so they tend to attract more money by naturally acting in accordance with their beliefs. Poor people often tend to think about lack, and so they attract this experience.

The inside-out

We create our own reality in two ways. One is our self-talk. We talk to ourselves all day long. You can often catch the moment shortly after you wake up when the script kicks in – for a short while after you wake up, your mind is blank; you-re not thinking anything in particular. But suddenly you will remember what happened to you yesterday or last week (good or bad) and your internal talk will begin. If you-re not very conscious about it, this script will just run in the background all day and you will react to situations in your usual conditioned manner. But if you can become aware that this is happening, you can start to replace to old script with a self-talk based on conscious choice.

The other is our visualization. We see ourselves in certain scenarios in our mind’s eye. Again, if you are conscious, you can replace the ‘default’ visualizations (of being a victim, being poor etc.) with new ones about abundance, happiness, confidence and control. Start visualizing what you want to achieve, how you want to feel and what sort of person you want to be.

The subconscious ensures that our images are translated into reality. A change in our mind will work its way out. Our subconscious mind ‘believes’ what it is told by the thinking, self-talking, visualizing mind and does not recognize any difference between a real experience and an imaginary one. So we need to be careful what we think about and talk to ourselves about, and what we see in our mind’s eye. These words and images will be turned into reality as sure as day follows night. In the end, we see the world as we are.

The role of action

Everyone has his own specific vocation or mission in life; everyone must carry out a concrete assignment that demands fulfilment. Therein he cannot be replaced, nor can his life be repeated, thus, everyone’s task is unique as his specific opportunity to implement it.

When you do what you love, the whole world comes alive. It starts dancing to your tune – it becomes your puppet. When you are doing the thing you love, you will naturally draw the right people and resources towards yourself to ensure that you accomplish your goals.

Taking action is important – without it you will probably never achieve anything. But the action must be easy, effortless even. And action can only be effortless when you are ‘in the flow’ of the universal stream. To do a job you hate is to swim against the tide; to get up every day and go to a job you feel no enthusiasm for is a waste of life.

The way we are now is a result of our past thoughts, our self-talk and visualizations. But every moment is a new beginning. Our future depends on what we are thinking about right now. So to create the life we desire, we should dwell on thoughts about the things we love and trust the universe to take care of it.

Author bio: Mark Harrison writes at Effortless Abundance. Check out his latest book, Thirty Days to Change Your Life.

By Liz Rotundo

In Baron Baptiste’s book 40 Days To Personal Revolution, he explains his Twelve Laws of Transformation. Law 2 is “Be Willing to Come Apart.” He uses the example of a mustard seed that must first break apart before it can grow to be a majestic tree.

Looking around the classroom that is Nature, we are given so many examples of this very transformation. A seed must crack its exterior to grow into a mighty oak tree. A baby bird struggles to break free of its life-sustaining shell. A beautiful butterfly must tear away at its chrysalis in order to fly for the first time. The crystallized array of colors in a geode must have its exterior broken open before it can shimmer.

Nature gives us these gifts so that we can understand that we also must break through our hardened shell in order to release our greatest potential.

The act of breaking apart came into my life, full force, just six months ago. I experienced what we commonly call a broken heart. My partner of ten years ended our relationship and I was completely blindsided by her decision. I felt myself falling apart mentally, emotionally and physically. At times I felt that I would never recover and that my heart would never mend. The thought of love ever filling my heart again was not even a remote possibility.

In her book How Not to Be Afraid of Your Own Life, Susan Piver writes:

Heartbreak presents one of the most profound opportunities for spiritual awakening that one could possibly hope for. It destroys your point of view, which is incredibly valuable. You can no longer maintain your opinion of yourself, your ex, or the way your life was supposed to turn out. It’s all gone.

The weight of my broken heart bore down on me heavily after my partner left. I wanted to blame her for my pain. For not wanting to get out of bed. For missing many days of work because I couldn’t face the world. Family members, worried about my mental and emotional state, were checking on me constantly. Co-workers were pleading with me to get counseling. In order to appease them (or, more accurately, to get them off my back), I made an appointment with a therapist. I figured that I’d go for a couple sessions, cry and feel sorry for myself, then stop going. That was not the case. I was truly fortunate to be paired with an amazing woman whose guidance, light and compassion helped me immensely. From her, I learned about energy medicine, various self-healing techniques and countless other lessons that I was ready for. Coupled with the love and support of family, friends and co-workers, I kept pushing myself to grow a little each day. I surprised myself at how ready I was for all of the great experiences that came into my life during this time. Four months later, I am in a positive — even blissful — state. I am forever grateful to these wonderful teachers.

In these four short months, I began to think that my partner did both of us a favor. In my case, I felt like this “slap in the face” was precisely what I needed in order to wake up to my life and notice how it was slipping away. It took some time, but I finally took hold of the reins and began to guide my life on a path of my choosing. Realizing that I had allowed too much of my life to go by without even attempting to make it what I wanted, I knew that I was given a gift: re-create my life. By my heart breaking (open), I was able to begin the work and exploration that I had avoided for far too long.

For well over ten years, I declared that my anthem was a song called “U Decide” by Sun 60. The one line that I claimed as my own was, “When do we become the person lost and locked inside?” I’d written that line in my journals numerous times. I used it as a signature line in my personal emails and in online profiles. I kept asking the Universe, not myself, when would I become that person locked inside of me? It was only during the past four months that I had an “aha!” moment. The only person responsible for freeing that person locked inside of me is ME. When I realized this, I immediately felt lighter and, yes, FREE. I suddenly understood that for so many years, I believed that the person inside me should be fully formed and know WHO she was and WHERE her life would take her. In this incredible moment of clarity, I accepted that it’s ok to let her free now even though she is not yet fully formed. I knew that, once free, she’d find her way. And I was, in that instant, completely open to the possibilities.

Other lyrics in “U Decide” resonate with me as well. “Take a look at your life/take a look at mine/there is nothing here to chain your mind” and “U decide/all the colors in your life.” My focus shifted from one of reaction to one of taking responsibility for the colors in my own life. I felt the key turning in the lock. I felt my inner being stepping into the world for the first time. And I knew that she’d be just fine.

Baron Baptiste writes:

We all have flashes of awareness in which we realize that who we are in all our smallness has essentially to break apart in order for a new self to emerge….I’ve learned that it is only when we are willing to give up the fragile hold we have on our illusions and come apart that we can begin to see the truth, surrender, and begin anew.”

I encourage anyone who is experiencing a broken heart (or a feeling of falling apart or having a breakdown) to, first and foremost, seek out help and take gentle care of yourself. Then, when you’re ready, try to imagine your heart, breaking open, as a necessary part of expanding your life into one that you create. Think of your heart widening to embrace you and all that your life is meant to be.

My perspective shifted from one of blaming my ex for my broken heart to one of realizing that my heart was breaking open for a good reason. I had a tremendous life-force  that could no longer be contained. The life-force was one of growth, passion, self-realization and love that had become too big for the container (my heart) that it was in. The breaking apart HAD to happen, and I’m glad that it did. I am a changed person because of it. I am strong, positive, embracing my spirituality and completely open to growth. In this act of my heart breaking apart, my life opened to me. And, with gratitude, I am open to my life.

About the author: Liz Rotundo is a freelance writer based in upstate New York.

© Liz Rotundo, 2010

By JC

How in the world does a person grow during the low points in life?  How can we take our setbacks and turn them into something great?  What can we learn from our perceived failures?  If there’s anything I’ve learned in all my 23 years, it’s how to use my darkest hours and lowest points in life to learn a lesson and eventually create a success.

To better understand where I’m coming from today, I want to open up with a quote from the late Randy Pausch:

The brick walls are not there to keep us out. The brick walls are there to give us a chance to show how badly we want something. Because the brick walls are there to stop the people who don’t want it badly enough.

It oftentimes takes something really disappointing, something really drastic to get us out of our comfort zone and onto a real journey through life.  It’s like the old saying goes; “everyone wants to go to heaven, but nobody wants to die.”

It seems that everyone wishes to do something great or different but the major factor we all miss out on is our reaction to a setback.  The way one perceives their failures will tell you a lot about the type of person they are.  For some, failure means the end of the world.  For others, it only means they learned how not to do something.

So, how can we change our thinking and learn how to grow during our downtimes?

We must remember three things.

1. Failure Is An Illusion

Failure is a terrible word – I hate to use it actually.  The connotation is negative; no, scratch that.  It’s actually repulsive.  To me, a failure is nothing but a lesson.  Michael Jordan, as well as many other high achievers, will tell you they are most successful because they failed more than anyone else.

To them, the failures were their best teachers.  They were never truly a failure in the sense of the word because they kept pushing for something better; they kept getting up.  Their minds revolved around an explicit goal and their passion for success was greater than the reminiscence of an unfulfilled dream.

This is why failure is an illusion.  If you choose to look at your setbacks as lessons, as positive criticism on how to improve yourself, you will never experience true failure; it’s impossible.  You will continue growing because your eyes are set on what’s in front of you (desires, goals, passions) as opposed to the setbacks behind you.

During the downtimes, you may feel like a failure or be experiencing what you perceive to be failure.  Remember, it’s an illusion; it’s only masking a great lesson to be learned.  Embrace your experiences and grow from them.

In order to treat your perceived failures as lessons you must ask 2 questions.  What can I learn from this?  How can I make it better?  I believe the answers are always there; however, you may have to ponder some questions longer than others.

2. Obstacles Are Present For A Reason

Ever wonder why everyone isn’t rich and famous?  Ever think about why there are only a handful of professional athletes in the world? Ever wonder why some people get so much accomplished while others seem to mire in mediocrity?

One reason: Obstacles.

Everyone experiences obstacles in some form or fashion.  It’s simply a part of life.  It’s also the reason why only a select few people ever seem accomplish anything worthwhile.  To be a professional athlete requires lots of dedication, practice, and the guidance of a great coach.  Granted, you need some talent, but talent is overrated.  Practice and persistence go much further than talent ever will.  Do you remember what Benjamin Franklin once said?  “Diligence is the mother of good luck”.

Oftentimes, certain obstacles are thought of as the lowest of the lows.  My best friend just graduated with his MBA and he’s been pounding the pavement looking for work.  Still, after lots of interning and working odd jobs for months, he’s landed nothing solid.

To date, this is one of the biggest obstacles he’s ever faced.  However, he kept pushing; kept pursuing and doing what he thought was best.  Just when he imagined it was time to quit his internship, he spoke with the boss and landed a position.  Right as he began to entertain the thought of leaving, his diligence paid off.

Remember, the obstacles you face are there for a reason.  They’re present to make you appreciate your accomplishments and they weed out the competition.  It would be a boring life if everything worth having was easy to obtain.  Obstacles are a blessing in disguise.

3. You Are More Than Enough

Yes, you.  You are more than enough.  You don’t need much, if anything at all.  All you need is you and a personal belief in yourself.  You must learn to use your downfalls and setbacks as opportunities to grow and reach new heights.  Remember that failure is only real when you choose to let it defeat you.  It only exists when you allow yourself to give up.

Breaking barriers in your path are what make the journey so exhilarating.   Hurdling obstacles and watching yourself progress is what makes life worth living.  You are fully capable of turning your lowest of lows into the most memorable experiences of your life.

So what are you currently dealing with that you could change for the better?  How could you turn your current situation into the best lesson you’ve learned yet?  How can you create your ideal reality because of what you may now perceive as a setback?

About the author: JC is the author of JCDFitness, where he writes about fat loss, building muscle and his relaxed approach to all things fitness.  Be sure to check out his free eBook, A No-BS Approach to Looking Great Naked and follow him on Twitter.