What I Would Tell My 20 Year Old Self
I really enjoyed writing my last post, What I Would Tell My 15 Year Old Self, so here is a follow up. My life changed a lot between 15 and 20, just as it has between 20 and my current age (25). As I noted in my previous post, I don’t actually want to change the past. I’m sure, though, that some of my readers going through a similar stage of their lives, so here is some food for thought:
Get Involved
At age 20 I was mid-way through my university degree. I was lucky enough to go to a great university, but one regret I have is not getting more involved in university life. Universities, or whatever type of learning institution you attend, hold so many opportunities to get involved and make a difference. Getting involved in a club, perhaps in the role of President or Treasurer, can help you build skills that will stay with you for life. And the networking opportunities at university are endless.
Look After Your Brain
My late teens and early twenties can be described as a period of hedonism. Late nights, heavy drinking, and drug-taking were fairly common. I had a lot of fun during this period, but in retrospect I sometimes worry about the damage I inflicted upon my brain. Now at 25, I don’t feel that my thinking is as sharp as it once was. So then, my advice is to have fun and enjoy the present, but be mindfully aware that what you do today determines how you will live tomorrow. If you do have to drink or take drugs, do it in moderation.
Be Careful
Whilst my mid-teens were characterized by my unpopularity, by 20 I had made many great friends. One event that sticks with me, though, was a night when I went to a bar with some friends. Driving home from the bar, the driver (who was sober) lost control of the car and hit a tree. Being in the back passenger side, I took the worst of the hit and had to be cut out of the car by the Fire Department. I was okay, except for some glass that missed my eye by the smallest of margins. I was in hospital for 2 days, and I now have permanent scaring around my left eye.
I was one of the lucky ones. Many young people, especially males, die from car related accidents each year. My advice is to drive safely, and watch who you get into a car with. You are extremely powerful, but you are not invincible.
Photo by nytejade.
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6 Comments
November 30th, 2007 at 5:04 pm
This is a subject I too have been thinking a lot about lately. And I recently did a post on it on my blog called, Growing up: Is that all there is? http://theuniverseas.com/archives/68 It’s an interesting subject to think about. And I think the thing to take away from it all is to make the future what you think you should have made the past.
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November 30th, 2007 at 5:23 pm
Wow, guess you liked my idea… I didn’t expect TWO posts
I understand, though… there are probably different things that I needed to hear more at 15 than at 20 and that would be different than when I was 25 (I’m 30). I think the one thing that keeps becoming clearer as I get older and continue to grow is the need to take more responsibility for myself (by ceasing to give others power over me… by worrying about what they think, for example), and at the same time, the need to allow others more of a chance to be closer to me.
By the way… thanks for being a friend.
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December 1st, 2007 at 3:15 am
Yes, given I am currently 25, what would my 30/ 40/ 50 year old selves have to say to me? An interesting thought exercise indeed.
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December 2nd, 2007 at 1:53 am
Thanks Jason
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December 2nd, 2007 at 7:09 pm
I got a call early this morning. My cousin past away in a car accident and I’ve been up all morning crying. I just saw her two weeks ago at her sisters wedding. I think it had something to do with a drunk driver.
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December 18th, 2007 at 9:02 am
First off, I need to say to Doodoolicious that I’m so sorry that they have suffered the loss of a loved one. My thoughts will be with you and yours over this holiday period.
Secondly, what I would want to say to my 20 year old self is “this to shall pass”. When I turned 20 I was living in a remote cottage on the north coast of Scotland with my 2 babies, both under the age of 18 months, and I was so lonely, isolated and sad. Days would pass that felt like months, and frequently my husband would come home from work to find the 3 of us in tears. However, it didn’t last. We moved, I made new friends, started new projects. Life went on. And now I can look back on that time and appreciated the good that came out of it. I actually wrote a post about it not to long ago. You can find it here if you’re interested.
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