Image courtesy of Esparta

In recent weeks, several friends who are experiencing financial challenges have posed this question to me:

Why is that so many aspects of my life seem to be flowing, but when it comes to money, I feel so stuck?

Or,

Why is it that when I’m meditating, creating, writing or “in the zone,” I feel alive and vibrant, as though I’m living at the highest of frequencies, but when it comes to finances, I come crashing back to earth?

These are important questions and the answers are both simple and complex.

They remind me of a time in my life of profound financial struggle, a time when both these questions were constantly on my mind.

The “Olinda Effect”

We were living on Maui then, in the coastal community of Kihei. Here, in this amazing Pacific paradise, money was a constant challenge. And despite my two jobs and our weekends selling crystals at the island’s flea market, there was never enough to cover all our bills.

Kihei was supposed to have been a landing place, we thought, our first stop on the climb to prosperity. Our desired destination was the tourist-free — and pricier — uplands of Kula.

Every couple of weeks we’d drive up the mountain, often to the lush hills of Olinda, where we’d gaze admiringly at the handsome homes and go walking in Olinda’s serene experimental forest.

While strolling among the stately pines, anything seemed possible: infinite abundance, an Olinda mansion, work that impassioned us… It all felt within our grasp. Easily.

And then we’d drive back down the mountain to Kihei, down to our tiny condo with its overdue rent and overdue bills, back to the jobs I hated, back to a life that wasn’t in flow.

By the time we reached sea level, the “Olinda Effect,” as we’d dubbed it, had fully kicked in: We were anxious, fearful and no longer in that anything-is-possible Olinda resonance.
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Tags: Life, Money // 20 Comments »

Image by Tambako the Jaguar

Do you sometimes wonder if you’re on the wrong path through life – but can’t see any way to rework your footsteps and join a different one?

After I graduated from University, I wrote in my journal:

It is exciting to have my whole life ahead of me and know that I could do pretty much anything I put my mind to. It’s daunting but exhilarating to stand at the summit of 16 years’ full-time education and gaze out at the land around me. I could go anywhere from here.

But I didn’t “go anywhere”. I took a well trodden path by getting a job (tech support) in London, leaving home and renting accommodation. The first couple of weeks were fun: I’d worked in temporary office jobs as a student and enjoyed the environment, I was excited to be in London, I was learning a lot of new techy things at work.

But after a month, I wondered “Is this all there is now? For the next 40 years of my life?” And I stumbled across an article online: Steve Pavlina’s 10 Reasons You Should Never Get a Job:

It’s funny that when people reach a certain age, such as after graduating college, they assume it’s time to go out and get a job. But like many things the masses do, just because everyone does it doesn’t mean it’s a good idea.

Lessons learned: Just because “everyone else” is taking one route (whether in their job, social life, eating habits or spending habits) doesn’t mean that you have to follow them. Take the time to look for the beginnings of other paths, even ones which are hidden and rarely trodden.
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Tags: Life, Meaning & Purpose // 33 Comments »

Image by *Zara

“The foolish man seeks happiness in the distance; the wise grows it under his feet.” - James Openheim

Advice on how to be happy used to be the purview of self-help gurus. However, over the past few years scientists and psychologists have begun to give serious study to the subject of happiness. Although they’ve discovered that about 50% of happiness is determined by a person’s genes, and another 8 to 10% by life’s circumstances–such as income, health, and marital status–, the remaining 40% is up for grabs. In addition, scientists have found several ways to create true happiness, six of which are explained below.

1. Find Meaning

The concept “eudaimonia” is a key term in ancient Greek moral philosophy which means striving toward excellence based on one’s unique talents and potential. Dr. Martin Seligman, founder of “Positive Psychology”—a new branch of psychology that studies what makes people feel fulfilled, engaged, and happy—argues that in order to create lasting happiness we should figure out our strengths and find ways to direct them toward achieving meaningful goals. In addition, Richard J. Davidson of the University of Wisconsin-Madison indicates that the positive emotions that accompany thoughts of having purpose in our lives is one of the most enduring components of well-being.
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Tags: Happiness // 37 Comments »

No, I don’t really think responsibilities are a drag, but sometimes it feels that way…..

When I think about it, the life I have now at 26 - settled down with a wife and two kids - was the life I expected at 36. I love my current situation, but even so there are times when I know my responsibilities as a father keep me from what I might otherwise be doing. For example, recently there was a huge music festival close to Vancouver that featured Coldplay, Nine Inch Nails, Tom Petty & the Heartbreakers, Wolfmother and many, many more great bands. BC (Before Children) Kathryn and I would have been there in an instant. Instead we spent most of the weekend hanging around the house. This is not to say it was a bad weekend (it was quite a good weekend thank you very much), but it certainly didn’t contain the thrills and excitement of a music festival featuring some of the biggest bands in the world and 40,000+ people.

Sometimes responsibility is something we willingly take on, but at other times it is thrust upon us without us having much say in the matter. As I have previously written about, becoming a dad was the last thing I wanted when I was told the big news on my 24th birthday (what a present!). I now consider fatherhood to be the greatest experience of my life, so obviously my attitude toward this responsibility changed.

In this article I would like to share some advice as to what to do when life taps you on the shoulder and tells you it is time to step up and take on a major responsibility. Perhaps, like I was, you are surprised to discover you are going to be a parent. Maybe you need to start caring for an elderly parent or someone with special needs. Or perhaps you are being promoted to a management position at work. There are endless examples of responsibilities……. lets get on and have a look at what you can do.
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Tags: Happiness, Life, Parenting // 14 Comments »

All true artists, whether they know it or not, create from a place of no-mind, from inner stillness.

Recently I was listening to an episode of the Oprah / Eckhart Tolle podcasts. Tolle described how he writes, and I was struck by the simplicity and peacefulness of the process. If you ever experience writer’s block, or if the words you do write feel forced, this guide may prove to be the solution for your troubles.

The following is a summary of how Eckhart Tolle writes:

1. Stillness
2. Awareness of thoughts as they arise
3. Write, or if the thought is not relevant or useful, wait in stillness for the next one

I think this writing process can be condensed even further into the following two words: stillness speaks (fans of Tolle will recognize this as the name of one of this books). Recently I have been testing this process, and in this article I would like to share some practical advice related to each of the above steps.
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Tags: Awareness // 22 Comments »

Rack pull. Photo by Scott Bird.

After a nine year break, I began lifting weights again about four years ago. This absence had not done me any favors; and I was slow, weak and a little on the heavy side.

Having eventually made the decision to begin doing something (and believe me - after 9 years, this didn’t exactly come easily), I was faced with an all-too-common dilemma. Where?

Gyms can be intimidating places at the best of times. As an outsider, it seemed as though all the members were in pretty good shape to start with. I’d stick out like a sore thumb.

Instead, I decided to set up a home gym. Get myself into a reasonable condition before I went anywhere near the commercial options. And then I discovered it - the art of working out alone.
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Tags: Health & Fitness // 20 Comments »