Be Do Have

Be Do Have

“You can’t become who you dream of becoming if your daily activities aren’t related to the dream person you want to become.” - Wilson Ferreira

My journey of change ran head first into a brick wall in 2012. I have never been one to follow the conventional route, so it certainly wasn’t the first obstacle I’ve met. This was different, it didn’t just stop me in my tracks, it floored me.

I lost my health. Always a pillar in my life, my health and fitness were a constant that I relied on. In July, a headache started that never went away. It became debilitating before a bleed was discovered on my brain.

Fast forward to April 2013. I am finally seeing the light at the end of the tunnel. My energy is returning, I no longer have to nap every couple hours.

I am going to be all right.

The condensed version always sounds better, doesn’t it? In the context of personal pain or hardship, shortening the story somehow makes it more manageable.

It isn’t so and we shouldn’t do it.

Being willing to change requires us to be open to all experiences and to be committed to finding the value in every situation.

The reality of “I am going to be all right” comes following a battery of tests, CT scans, MRI, angiogram, three surgeries, infection on my brain, an intravenous catheter for six weeks, antibiotic induced neutropenia, having to rebuild my immune system, the lingering affect of meds and a six inch scar across my skull.

I am grateful for life.

Throughout this ordeal, I could see on the faces of family members and friends that their outlook for my future was considerably grimmer than my own. However, the potential long-term impact of a brain injury did slap me into reality one morning.

In the midst of recovering from one surgery and waiting to find there was still something wrong with me, I was at home. I was typing in my office when my hands became heavy and I felt dizzy. I managed to get to my bed and lie down for half an hour.

Everything seemed to pass.

I went back to the email I was trying to finish and send earlier. I started reading from the beginning to recap before I started. Three paragraphs in, the use of punctation and capitals was flawless but the words were all jumbled, out of order and some of them didn’t make sense. The last few words looked like a toddler had been hitting the keyboard.

I had a seizure or mini stroke or TIA – whatever you call it, a sudden loss of control was enough to freak me out.

(Please take 10 minutes to interact with this website which shows the warning signs of stroke. Click the hotspots and read – it could save your life or the life of someone you love)

That is part of the longer story. The very real and true affect circumstances have on our lives. When it is all around you and it is all that you know at that moment, it can be almost impossible to separate yourself from the situation, but we must.

You see, it is not our circumstances that control us but how we choose to interpret those circumstances. This is taken loosely from one of my favorite people, Rex Crain and his book Life Lift. Separate the circumstance from your ability to choose and you take back power over your life.

The rest of the longer story is sorting out those circumstances. For myself, over the past 7 months and an ongoing recovery, I have lost a lot. I am a small business owner, but it’s really a one man band operation, me trading my hours for dollars. My inability to go to work destroyed my ability to earn an income. Financial destruction.

My illness has caused stress on my entire family. My wife and children yes, but parents, extended family and friends too, have made sacrifices. My boat didn’t just get rocked, it got flipped over and there isn’t a corner of my life that was unaffected.

Where do I go from here? How do I recover? Maybe you are asking yourself the same questions.

I use a tool:  Be Do Have

Be willing to Do whatever it takes to Have what you want.

This comes back to that wonderful gift we were created with, the ability to choose. You and I get to make a choice, do we let the circumstances kick the crap out of us or do we choose to do differently?

  • Be Willing – the word will means to intend, deciding what to do, purpose, volition, determination. It is synonymous with another powerful word; Resolve, a promise to yourself to finish what you have started.
  • Do – the doing is the action part, perform, work at, work out, solve, bring about or FINISH. The DOER is an energized person of action.
  • Have – the things, circumstances and beliefs that we allow in our your lives. Have means to possess, obtain, hold, affected with, give birth to. What you allow or cause to be done.

When we aren’t interested in the components of this rule, the things and circumstances that we HAVE (what shows up in our lives) aren’t the ones we would choose for ourselves. By not using our ability to choose, we lose it. The only things, circumstances and results that then manifest in our lives are those imposed by people and forces other than ourselves. We allow ourselves to accept the leftovers.

Some people go through life in misery, unaware that change is possible, hoping and wishing that things will get better. The reality is that things change when we ourselves decide to get better.

There is a fire waiting to be lit within all of us. It just needs a spark, a source of ignition. That is why we should welcome all experiences, you never know which one will light the flame. It could come to you from a decision, out of disgust, from a deep desire or an undeniable resolve. When we choose to get better, more becomes available to us.

So ask yourself two things. Are my excuses bigger than my dreams? Can I find the resolve to make today, a Life Changing Day?

Be Do Have

I did and so can you!

Photo by JohnONolan

Mike Martens

I am a family man living in Cochrane, AB Canada. I am a networker, small business owner and creator of GetBetterHQ.com - Do Something With Life Before Life Does Something With You. Please connect with me on Facebook at www.GetBetterHQ.com/facebook or Twitter @GetBetterHQ or email: teammartens@gmail.com.

Latest posts by Mike Martens (see all)

21 Comments

  1. “Be Do Have”
    You have actually put into words what I needed so much…..Thank you so much!!!
    Your courage and conviction is so admirable!!! So is your willingness to share this experiance!!
    Thanks again!!!
    Wish you all the best that life has to offer!!!

    Reply
    • Your comment is an amazing compliment Jayalakshmi. Thank you very much and I am glad you enjoyed it.

      Reply
      • Dear Mike,
        thanks for this wonderful blog….. It certainly is life changing. Also I wish you with my sincerest best wishes.. You are gonna get back with life , in life ….
        Thanks and regards
        Surender

        Reply
        • I am glad that you enjoyed it SK and I appreciate your well wishes.

          Reply
  2. Mike that was such a spiritually uplifting post to read. The strength you have gleaned from your situation is incredible to witness. The universe in all its wisdom will take you to a higher place I am sure because of what you have been through and more so because of what you are teaching others. Good luck with your future and continue to help others with your wisdom. You certainly have helped me.

    Reply
    • Wow Joan, I am grateful for your words and I will keep turning the mess into a message!

      Thanks

      Reply
  3. Hello Mike

    I am recognizing more and more that what we accomplish comes down to choice, commitment and action.
    He who walks the path knows … you have;you do.
    Inspiring post!

    Reply
  4. You are right on the money with that statement Kathy!! We were all created with the unique and amazing ability to choose. It’s like anything else though, if you don’t use it – you lose it. When we don’t make conscious choices our lives become more reactionary and driven by the circumstances around us and the choices of others.

    I love this quote by Jim Rohn, ” If you don’t design your own life plan, chance’s are you will fall into someone else’s plan. And guess what they have planned for you? Not Much. “

    Reply
  5. Hi Mike, I enjoyed your story. You are a very inspiring writer with a great style. Your honesty shows your strength.

    Sometimes illnesses evolve for reasons of which can only be seen when we take a step out of the normal way of living. Upsets to our health can also be a strong call to review our lives & make change for the better. All we can do is to look deep within to seek answers to further empower us.

    There are reasons for everything to occur and the strongest of people see the positive side of which you have proven. I have known healthy people to become unexpected weak. I believe illnesses are a call for us to find new paths to grow more spiritual. As there is never a limit to how enlightened we can be. Meditation or any activity that raises the vibrational frequency all helps towards recover. Sometimes we just have to experiment to find what is right for us.

    The are many people who focus their energy on the need to HAVE without giving much consideration to the Be and Do. The BE should have a strongest focus, as intentions move the creations onto a path.

    I just released a video on How to Energise Intentions to Manifest Goals into Reality on my website, which would compliment this :)

    Thank you Mike for sharing your inspiring story. Keep creating what you LOVE.

    Reply
    • That is great stuff Paul, thanks a lot. I am looking forward to checking out your website.

      Reply
  6. Thank you so much, just what I needed to hear. You truly are an inspiration, a positive doer making a positive difference ,take care and keep posting

    Reply
    • Thank you Shirley, I sincerely appreciate the genuine encouragement!

      Reply
  7. It’s all about choices……What an amazing & uplifing story!!! Keep up the great work that you’re doing each & every day. Thank You for your Awesome inspiration!!!

    Reply
  8. Mike, thank you so much for sharing your story. You remind us that we are all TAB (temporarily able bodied), and we need to make the most of each opportunity, including the opportunity to come back from an (extreme) obstacle. I wish you the very best in every challenge you choose to challenge and overcome!

    Reply
    • Thank you Cecilia that is exactly the way that I have decided to look at this entire ordeal. You can’t have a comeback without a setback!

      Reply
  9. Wonderful inspirational post. Despite the trauma you have gone through, Mike, you have , thanks God, come out of it instead of sinking into the quagmire of despair and depression. Even if the body suffers, the mind should not co-operate but remain detached as far as humanly possible. Body invariably follows the mind; if the mind can remain positive and withstand pain and stress, chances are the the body may also acquiesce. Every one can not be a yogi but surely one can learn to be positive and refuse to surrender to adverse circumstances and pain.

    Reply
  10. thanks for that your inspirational posting am able to learnt that is always good to face life in realities and be positive minded.
    thanks for sharing this with us.

    Reply
    • That is Awesome Adedayo ojo! I appreciate your comments my friend.

      Reply
  11. a great reminder I very much enjoyed.

    Reply
  12. Thanks for the article, Mike. It’s great that your health is better!

    I got very sick in my teens as a result of a reaction to medications. I was very fit and was intending on becoming a professional athlete, even an Olympic competitor. Once the damage-related illness hit me it was all I could do to stay alive. I have now fought it for over twenty years.

    After a while, when you realise that even with the best attitude possible you are never going to be able to reclaim what was lost, you have one choice left. You can choose to be angry or you can choose love. It’s a choice that is regularly revisited.

    I now work with severely disabled people. None of them are capable of looking after themselves. Some of them are not even able to talk. I used to wonder about this, about whether a life was still worthwhile if you could not achieve anything beyond perhaps the hope of not crapping in your pants every day. After all, I was a previous athlete and very competitive. After a lot of thought, my answer was this: if you can love and be loved, you are fulfilling your life’s purpose.

    Reply
    • Wow, what an amazing story Mark. Thank you for sharing it and I am glad you are on your Purpose!

      Reply

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