The Art of Thoughtful Wishing

Many people equate money and the accumulation of it the fulfillment of their desires. We believe it will bring us happiness, yet no matter how much we seem to earn, we always want more. The pursuit of money is what causes many people to confuse those things they want with what they really need. So many people go through life not realizing that happiness does not happen when we yearn for things we lack.

In addition to longing for money, we also tend to yearn for things that we have lost or things that have passed us by. Our memories tend only to remember what we want them to remember, distorting our images of the past. This type of wishful thinking distracts us from enjoying what we have, right now.

We spend so much of our lives regretting things that have already happened, or hoping for things to come, that we forget to live for today. Follow these steps and you will learn to live in the present, and appreciate those blessings you do have.

Take Joy Where You Can Find It

Allow yourself to feel pleasure and pride at even the smallest accomplishments. Gather your strength so you can perform the tasks that await you, meet adversity with courage, and enjoy every moment of it. Learning to find happiness in the smallest things will add a great deal of enjoyment to your life and help counteract the stresses that build up over time from our daily obligations.

Free Yourself by Forgiving Your Rivals

Whether it is an adversary in the workplace or someone on your weekend softball team, allow yourself to forgive those who have wronged you. As difficult as it may be, carrying around a grudge takes effort and energy that can best be spent elsewhere. It also produces a great deal of negative energy that will affect your attitude and how you view the world. Acknowledge when you have been wronged, accept that nobody is perfect, and let it go.

Do Not Take Yourself Too Seriously

Just as it is important to accept the fact that others are flawed, it is just as important to remember that you are flawed as well. Acknowledge that everyone has imperfections, and allow yourself to enjoy your successes, but do not take them too seriously. Just about the time you begin to believe you are invincible, someone will come along and prove otherwise. Enjoy your success, but do not let it get the best of you.

Enjoy Friendship and Companionship

Take pleasure in the company of others. Be thankful for your spouse or significant other, cherish your children, and nurture your friendships. There is no greater gift in life that those people who love us and accept us for who we are – flaws and all. Take the time to honor them as their friendship honors you.

Give to Others

Giving can be physical – in the form of time and attention, such as reading stories to sick children at the local hospital or working in a food bank once in a while. It can also be material, like providing basic necessities to the homeless, or donating to a fund to build a well in a starving village in Africa. You could even volunteer to walk dogs at the animal shelter. Whatever motivates you to give of yourself for another’s benefit, do so whenever you can. Not only will your actions be greatly appreciated, but you will be filled with an overwhelming sense of pride and well-being. The act of giving is soothing to the soul.

Rather than spend your time longing for things you do not have and may never receive, focus instead on what is happening to you right now. Break yourself of the bonds of wishful thinking, and take joy in the present. Thoughtful wishing is the act of expressing gratitude for the gifts you have received, and in turn giving something of yourself to others. The happiness you so desperately seek through money or possessions lies within yourself, and by following these simple rules, you will be able to discover what has been within your reach all along.

David B. Bohl

This article was written by David B. Bohl – Husband, Father, Friend, Lifestyle Coach, Author, Entrepreneur, and creator of Slow Down FAST.

Latest posts by David B. Bohl (see all)

10 Comments

  1. Very good post. I find that what we wish for often comes true; the difficult thing is wishing for the right thing.

    Tejvan

    Reply
  2. Good post. I’m the type of person that becomes emotionally attached to my memories and the past, and I find that it often causes me to wish for moment of my life that are gone and can’t be regained instead of enjoying the fact I had the experience to begin with. I think I’ll print this one out to remind me that life’s good as it is. Living in the past doesn’t get anyone anywhere.

    Reply
  3. Tejvan,

    Excellent commentary on the power of the mind. “Be careful what you wish for, lest it come true.”

    David

    Reply
  4. “Free Yourself by Forgiving Your Rivals”
    Thanks, Peter! This is exactly what I need to hear this morning! I had such a rough night and morning due to a friend taking constant shuts at me last night and as much as I keep telling myself “forgive her! she took the shuts out of insecurity! it’s not worth ruining your mood!”, it’s been taking a lot of energy from me and has made me so frustrated. I guess I have to keep working on it.

    Reply
  5. Sooski,

    Good for you! Why should we give the power to others and let them ruin our days and our lives? Overcoming resentments through forgiveness puts us back into the driver’s seat.

    David

    Reply
  6. Giving back is so important. It not only helps others but gives you a wonderful feeling of being needed and useful.

    Reply
  7. This is a great article David. I really enjoy how you discuss enjoying the small things. It is so important that we take time to realize how amazing the World we live in really is. Just think about all the thought that was put in to creating the seasons, the living creatures on this Earth, and the universe. What a wonderful blessing we have been given!

    http://juiceofchampions.com/home/enjoy-life-and-relax-with-nature

    Reply
  8. Lovely post!
    In our English language there is a nasty put-down for people who visualise the good things that are going to happen: ‘wishful thinking’.
    And yet, as this article points out, this is actually an art!

    Reply

Submit a Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

You may use these HTML tags and attributes: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <strike> <strong>